You don't need to put plastic on the shower ceiling. There won't be a significant amount of water to reach the ceiling, and what does get up there will evaporate, run down the walls, or drip on the floor. However, a cement board of some sort is advisable on the ceiling.
1. If you are installing CBU around the tub with no waterproofing on the CBU, then yes, you will need a vapor barrier behind the CBU. If you plan to waterproof the CBU, then no vapor barrier is needed.
2. 1/4" is fine. Fill the gap with silicone.
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The top ten reasons to procrastinate:
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